Diary of Fragile Heart (Spin of Loving You Too Long)

Flavia turns around and stands side by side with her friend in the same position. “Yes, doctors are only human. And Grandma is also human. But she’s a mother who loves her son so much. She does love me as her granddaughter, but she may not accept me as a daughter-in-law.” Flavia smiles at her friend again. “Do you forget what happened ten years ago?” Flavia reminds her friend of the memory when they overheard a conversation between Grandma and her mother.

Flashback

“I don’t mind you being close to Flavia. Because she’s a good girl. But think again, Claire. How can you decide to be involved with a widower who is fifteen years older than you?” The loud voice echoed loudly to the front door where Flavia and Abigail, who had just intended to greet, suddenly fell silent. The two girls in blue and white uniforms looked at each other and chose to listen in silence.

“What’s wrong with Antony, Ma? He’s a good man, stable. Handsome too.” Gladwin’s voice was heard defending his sister’s choice.

Life is not just about good looks and a stable life. Do you forget that he could even abandon his own child? If he could be so heartless to leave his daughter, maybe that’s the reason for the divorce as well. And Mama doesn’t want her child to suffer because of a selfish man like that.” Julie Hampton continued with fiery tone. “Moreover, you act as if there are no other men out there. You’re beautiful. There are many men out there who like you. If you can’t choose, let me find one for you. A bachelor who is ready for marriage and has a career.”

“Ma… don’t have such narrow-minded thoughts. What’s wrong with Antony being a widower and having a child? He has realized his mistakes and is redeeming all his past mistakes. Moreover, he and his ex-wife divorced not because of Antony’s fault. But it’s on his ex-wife.” Claire tried to defend.

“Oh, that’s just a one-sided excuse. Of course, he will defend himself. Where would he want to be blamed? Besides, you are my only daughter. I don’t want neighbors, Mama’s friends, and colleagues of your late father to talk about you. Can you imagine a virgin marrying a widower who already has a child? His child is the same age as your own niece. Where should I put my face, Claire?” Once again, Mrs. Julie spoke with a high-pitched voice.

Flashback off

Abigail looked at Flavia while Flavia chose to ignore her friend’s gaze. “But grandmother has changed her mind now. In the end, she accepted your father. And now she has also arranged for Uncle to marry a widow with children. Even though Uncle is also a bachelor. Uncle’s position now is the same as Aunty Claire’s position before.”

Flavia just smiled sadly and sat back down on the soft cushion. “Not the same, Abby. When Grandma agreed to Papa, it was because Grandma knew that Papa was fertile. Mama was healthy. And Papa clearly seemed to love me and Mama.

“Papa can prove that age is not a problem. But for me and Uncle’s case? I’m at the bottom of her dream daughter-in-law list.” Flavia lowered her head, looked at her left hand and tried to clench it tightly. Until now, that hand still couldn’t grip tightly. Abigail finally sat next to Flavia. She was pulling her best friend’s head towards her shoulder and stroking her long hair slowly.

“Really, Abby. If I could go back five years ago. I could find another way. And now I will confidently fight to win Uncle’s heart. But the past cannot be repeated. No matter how hard I try.” Abigail could feel her friend’s tears soaking through the thin t-shirt she was wearing. “By God, my feelings for Uncle have not even diminished at all. But what can I do?

“I’m even hesitant to fight for everything. I really want to be selfish and do what I want to do. I don’t care what people say. I want to be happy. But I can’t.

“I’m scared. What if one day, Uncle finally gives up on me? I won’t be able to face that, Abby.” Abigail felt Flavia’s fingers grip her shirt tighter. Abigail also hugged her best friend tightly. She cried with her, too.

‘Oh my God, how strong and fragile Flavia is at the same time. Why do you treat my friend like this? I know You love Your creatures so much. I know that You will not test her beyond her abilities. I know that this is a test of her faith and patience. But God, when will she get the fruits of her patience and sadness?

‘Can I ask You to hasten her happiness? So she can shed tears of joy? The hard times are enough. Let her be happy even if Uncle is not happy. Open her heart to another man who loves her no less sincerely.’ Abigail prayed silently.

Abigail is a witness to the sorrow that Flavia has felt for the past eleven years. She is Flavia’s only friend. Although the girl is friendly to everyone, Flavia is a closed-off person. When Abigail first met her, she even thought Flavia was just a rich and arrogant girl, considering her family name. But when her aunt reminded her that Flavia might act that way because she had no friends, Abigail tried to get closer to her.

And indeed, Flavia is someone who is difficult to get along with, not because she is arrogant, but because of her low self-esteem. After getting to know her, Abigail finally learned the reason behind her low self-esteem. Flavia is a child of divorce. Her parents separated even before she learned to walk. Since then, she has lived with her grandparents while her father chose to work in a different city.

Flavia never knew the reason for her parents’ separation. She received love from her grandparents and uncles, who were her father’s cousins. However, her father kept his distance from her. Eventually, Flavia learned that her parents’ separation was because her mother had an affair due to her father’s cold behavior. And her father kept his distance from Flavia because he always remembered the pain inflicted by her mother whenever he saw Flavia’s face.

Imagine, Flavia was more like an orphan at that time. Fortunately, she chose to be shy rather than rebellious to seek her father’s attention. Her father’s marriage to Aunt Abigail, despite initially causing conflicts in Abigail’s family, especially from her grandmother, eventually ended happily. Claire loved Flavia as if she were her own daughter. Antony tried to get to know his daughter again through Abigail and Claire. And now, the only man Flavia loves has become the toughest test in her life.

The love between Flavia and Gladwin is not forbidden love. There is no blood relation between them. The problem lies in Flavia’s low self-esteem and her uncle’s reluctance. Abigail has to find a way, just like she did before when she bridged the gap between Flavia, Claire, and Antony. This time, she must bridge the relationship between Flavia and Gladwin. Should she tell her uncle about what happened five years ago?

Gladwin doesn’t know what happened five years ago. Because of his cowardice, he chose to leave rather than fight for his feelings, not knowing what he left behind.Nôvel(D)ra/ma.Org exclusive © material.